Me: Oh my god what is that smell? <observing the Princess regarding me warily> I think the dog shit on the bed somewhere!!
Mr. Tip: <sheepishly watching me on my freaked out turd search> It might be my feet. I just took my boots off for a minute and my socks are…moist.
Me: <aghast> Gross. I almost threw up in my mouth.
Mr. Tip: <chortling> What? I can’t even smell them!
Me: I think it’s because you’ve gone nose blind.
Mr. Tip: It’s called ‘nasal fatigue’.
Me: It’s called “wash your fucking feet”.
Mr. Tip: <itching the damn things thus exacerbating the stench> No, I’m just going to put on different shoes and then you probably won’t smell them anymore.
Sorry ladies, he’s taken.